My Two Cents About the Economy

So, I certainly don't wish ANYONE out of their job, but with our economy the way it is, millions of people are left unemployed and THIS guy is still bringin' home the bacon? Really!?

Mmmmm Bop

I was jamming to music in the car today when I realized how incredibly dumb the lyrics were. Truth is, many of the songs I love to sing along to on the radio are this way. My husband informs me often about how "horrible" my taste in music is.

Actually, I think I have great taste in music. I just have 2 categories of favorites: one category is for music I like for their artistic and lyrical brilliance. The other category is simply music that I know is cheesy but I can't sit still or refrain from singing along when I hear it.

Today I will talk about the latter category. Here is my list of songs I am embarrassed to love, old and new:

"Work It" by Missy Elliot
"Toxic" by Britney Spears
"Mmm Bop" by Hanson (although I was never a Hanson fan beyond this song)
"The Sign" by Ace of Base (classic)
"Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani (I will never forget how to spell 'bananas' now!)
"Complicated" by Avril Lavigne
"Black Horse & a Cherry Tree" by KT Tunstall (good song to belt out on a road trip)
"When I Grow Up" by the Pussycat Dolls (I'm sorry, the song is hilarious)
"Hey Ya!" by Outkast (Lend Me Some Suga, I AM Your Neighbor! Haha!)
"Any Man of Mine" by Shania Twain (Still my favorite karaoke song!)
"It's Gonna Be Me" by N'Sync
"Pop" by N'Sync
"Come on Over" by Christina Aguilera
"Stay" by Lisa Loeb
"I Want You" by Savage Garden
"Ironic" Alanis Morsette
"Wanna Be" by the Spice Girls (makes me think of going to the skating rink)
"Zombie" by the Cranberries
"Don't Speak" by No Doubt
"Shiny and Happy People" by R.E.M.
"Mo Money Mo Problems" by Notorious B.I.G, Puff Daddy, and Mace (I think?)
"Give Me One Reason" by Tracy Chapman
"Mambo #5" by Lou Bega (Cheesiest of the Cheesy)
"If" by Janet Jackson
"No Rain" by Blind Melon
"Mr. Jones" by Counting Crows
"Everybody" by the Backstreet Boys (although it's the only song by them I liked)
"Killin Me Softly" by the Fugees
"Here Comes the Hotstepper" by Ini Kamoze (This was 4th grade for me!)
"Conga" by Gloria Estefan and the Miami Sound Machine (I think I have some Hispanic blood in me)
"Bawitdaba" by Kid Rock
"Buttons" Pussycat Dolls (such a ridiculous song)
"London Bridge" by Fergie (such a ridiculous song)
"My Humps" by the Black Eyed Peas (a song dedicated to butts and boobs? SO dumb, yet amazingly catchy at the same time)
"Who Will Save Your Soul" by Jewel (spent many nights imitating Jewel's voice to this back in the day)
"Smooth" by Carlos Santana and Rob Thomas

And my most recent embarrassing favorites include...

"Boom Boom Pow" by Black Eyed Peas
"See You Again" by Miley Cyrus (although I can't stand the girl)

I'm sure there are many more, but these are the ones that come to mind. Maybe one day I'll redeem myself by blogging about all of my favorite songs that actually have meaningful lyrics, but not now. I choose to come out of the closet with my love of bad music. I'm ok with that.

And deep within all of you, there is a love for one or two of these songs as well, I just know it. And if not, I guarantee you one thing...you will close this window out with "Mmmmm Bop" stuck in your head. You are welcome.

Watch the MmmmBop Video Here!

Peter Pan May Wear Tights and Hang Out With Fairies...

...but the guy may have been on to something with the whole "never growing up" concept.

I am the proud mom of a three month old (cutest one this side of Never Never Land, if you ask me). He is growing and changing so fast, I literally have a new child every morning I wake up. And while most moms are caught saying things like "I can't wait for him to be big enough to walk" or "It will be so fun when he's old enough to do (fill in the blank), I'm saying the opposite.

Now while I'd like to say that it's because I want to cherish each cute little phase he is going through and bask in the excitement of each newly-met milestone, I wouldn't be completely honest. Of course, like any good mom, those things are great and I do beam with pride at every little thing the munchkin does. But the main reason I don't want him to "grow up" just yet is Wal-Mart. Yes, you read that correctly...Wal-Mart.

In a recent trip to the place I hate to love, I didn't even make it through the double automatic doors before I saw some child crying and making a fit over what they couldn't get from the toy section. I made my way to the produce area only to see a distressed (to say the least) mommy picking up an avalanche of grapes that her toddler threw on the ground for no reason whatsoever. I heard a page over the intercom for a man to make his way to the customer service desk where his son, who had gotten lost, was waiting.

Then I looked down at my cart, where my perfect little angel is sleeping peacefully in his carrier, clueless about where we are, unable to grab at produce, run three aisles away, or beg for every toy in the G.I. Joe section. And I just smiled.

Yes, my son does some pretty adorable things, and I have no doubt that as he gets older he'll continue to be precious in my eyes. But for now, I will enjoy THIS phase, and laugh at other moms behind their backs as they encounter the other phases they were so eager to reach. (And I'll pray that when my son gets to the teenager phase HE will not wear tights or hang out with fairies, but that is a whole other blog post!)

Real Men of Genius

The following post is inspired by a recent visit to the church my husband attended in his youth. Let's just say I found out a little more about a man (whom I had never met) than I wanted to. I later found out that while all along I assumed that my husband knew this guy who was talking to us, he was actually just as clueless as I was!

I have decided to blog in the form of a very popular (and brilliant) Bud Light advertisement...Real Men of Genius style. The parts in parentheses are the background singers, so use your imagination and sing along as you read.

Brenna presents...Real Men of Genius (Real men of genius!)

Today, we salute you, Mr. Too Much Information Stranger Guy (Mr. Too Much Information Stranger Guy!)

You don't need to know the person you're talking to, because what you are about to say will break down all comfort walls within nanoseconds. (Very nice to meet ya!)

When everyone else candy coats their conversation with meaningless small talk, you dig down to the topics that really hit home. (WHOA! TMI!)

Relationship baggage, bedroom behavior, bowel movements...nothing is off limits for you. (I have diarrhea!)

When no one else wants it, you gladly hold the title of "that guy" with your head held high. (Be proud of who you are!)

So crack open a nice cold beverage, Mr. Too Much Information Stranger Guy. Because when it comes to pushing boundaries, you're the pioneer of awkward conversations. (Mr. Too Much Information Stranger Guy!)

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And now, just for fun, here is a link to listen to my absolute favorite Real Men of Genius commercials.

Mr. Giant Taco Salad Inventor

Mr. 80 SPF Sunblock Wearer

Thanks For The Advice, Now Leave Me Alone.

I know you didn’t ask, but if I could offer one piece of advice for newly pregnant women and new mommies it would be this: Don’t listen to people’s unsolicited advice.

A friend of mine visited our local lactation consultant when her new baby was having difficulties nursing. I consider this friend to be well-researched in the area of motherhood, as well as a perfectly loving and responsible mommy. My friend informed the consultant of the difficulties she had been facing, and told her that she was working on getting her baby on a 3 hour feeding schedule, distracting her as much as possible in between feedings. I can’t even believe the LC’s reaction. It went something like this: “How DARE you starve your poor little baby like that! All she wants is the comfort of her mommy’s touch and some warm milk to help her grow!” Are you kidding me? Look, lady. It’s one thing to disagree with the way someone is doing things. It’s a completely different thing to make someone feel like a total idiot for the choices they have made. Needless to say, I did NOT go to that lactation consultant when my baby came along. I did my own thing, which included putting him on a 3 hour feeding schedule and he is a perfectly healthy and plump baby boy, growing every day and as happy as can be. Eat that, lactation lady.

I am a list maker and a worrier by nature, so as soon as I found out that I was pregnant, it was only appropriate that I had a huge list of worries to go along with the shock and excitement that comes along with that new reality. There are so many choices to be made, each one with pros and cons. Natural birth or epidural? Exercise while pregnant or take it easy? Stay at home mom or working mom? Breast feed or formula? And the list goes on…

I decided to do a little web surfing to look for information about pregnancy, prenatal health, and child rearing. Big mistake. I quickly came to find out that for every search result (all five million and three of them) that came up, each one of them had a differing opinion on what should or should not be done.

The ladies at work didn’t help much, either. I absolutely love my colleagues. But what’s with people stating their advice as if it was the 11^th commandment, sent from Yahweh himself!? “You SHOULD ____________.” “ You DEFINITELY don’t want to _____________. “ “Make sure that you ___________.” “Oh honey, don’t waste your time doing ________.” Thou shall. Thou shall not. Blah, blah, blah. Did it ever occur to anyone that their exact experience might not be the exact experience I have with my pregnancy and my child?

Now don’t get me wrong, I think it is very important to do the research, stay informed, and surround yourself with supportive friends and family. But all of those “mommy forums” don’t cut it as reliable research. They are helpful, at times, to realize that you are not the only one going through this or that. I definitely visit them occasionally for a little security myself.

But somewhere throughout the journey of pregnancy/motherhood I realized that I have to stop feeling overwhelmed by depending on others’ opinions and start taking the advice I’m given with a grain of salt, trusting my maternal instincts and staying in communication with my doctor (who didn’t go to 4 extra years of school for nothin’). I have to do what works for MY family and leave it at that.

With all of that venting aside, I pledge this… to minimize my advice unless it’s asked for, as well as word it in a way that lets the advisee know that I can only speak for myself and what worked in my situation. I will not think they are idiots (or treat them as such) if they choose to do something differently than the way I do things. I pledge to let them be mommies in their own way.

So I know you didn’t ask, but ignore everyone else’s advice. Mine is better.